kanyewesticle:

i saw a chameleon today so i guess it was a pretty shitty chameleon

humorcat:

darrynek:

the nominees are

• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio

and the winner is *opens envelope*

• adele

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited

(Source: darrynek)

therealct1:

when u mom come home and make hte …….  .tORTELLINI????//??

illea:

i called my grandpa to wish him a happy 69th birthday and he said, “I skipped straight to 70. I don’t do 69 anymore, I’m too old to bend that way” and started laughing hysterically

grandpa

• me: omg did i reply too fast
• me: they're going to think i'm obsessed with them